An ‘Elvis Has Left The Building’ Occasion.

Hi,

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How the hell are you today.

It’s a Friday so you have got to be feeling good.

After all, there is the whole weekend not touched yet.

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But, an important question!

Have you made a will?

I have recently and it feels good to have done it.

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One strange thing though.

Now that I have actually faced up to the fact that I will actually die at some point, it is becoming like another sort of hobby.

I sometimes find myself thinking about my funeral, but in a fun sort of way, a bit like making party arrangements.

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I suddenly decide on bits of music that I would like to have played (at the moment it is Parachutes of course!)

What kind of flowers I would prefer ( at the  moment, I am torn between white lilies and my beloved Hydrangeas….but what colour do I like best! ).

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And how do I want to be dispatched on my final journey.

Buried, with sad and romantic marble figure gazing down at the actual spot, in true Victorian style.

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Being burned upon a funeral pyre out in a wild Northumberland place.

This used to be totally against the law as an exit plan, but it is possible now since a permission was recently given for this to happen, in accordance with the religion of the departed person.

I still have time to change mine.

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Or cremated, quick and clean, followed by a misty-eyed casting of my ashes upon a place meaningful to me.

But what place.

I love so many wonderful ones here.

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The park I loved as a child.

Tynemouth‘s beautiful beach.

The awesome Bamburgh.

The Alston moors.

Holy Island.

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Or perhaps I should be kept upon a mantelpiece in a costly bronze urn….or a large, bright pink piggy bank.

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Or perhaps the ashes should be mixed into some of those all fat ‘bird cakes’, and put out for my crows, who could not be trusted for an instant not to eat you if you were lying blind drunk and incapable in my garden.

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Or,

A sudden good thought….

What about an Elvis funeral….with the vicar or humanist or passing stranger dressed up in a full Elvis jump suit studded in gems and wearing Elvis sunglasses…. reading a very complimentary eulogy….before pointing his finger and declaiming that “Jaksie has left the building!”

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See what I mean, the list of amusements is an absolutely endless one, which varies to suit the mood, the weather and how grumpy I feel.

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And I have not even begun thinking about what I should wear!!!!!

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Have a marvellous Friday yourself.

J.

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