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Fun Poems

Poem: Going Away For A While.

Going Away For A While. . Going to jail Can leave you quite pale But a jaunt to Milan Leaves you tan. . .

Poem: A Proven Fact.

A Proven Fact. OK then, if he doesn’t fill it, who does? . I still believe that Santa’s real The things they say aren’t true, I always put MY stocking out Although I’m thirty two. . .

Poem: A Stupid Saying.

A Stupid Saying. . Two heads are better than one they say But that’s not strictly true, That’s not the answer you would get From someone who had two. . .

Poem: Hair.

. hair . why is my dog not bald . he’s always losing lots of hair it’s over here and over there he shakes and scratches til it drops how come it never stops . why is my father bald . he’s always losing lots of hair a little here a little there he tries […]

Poem: Farting Can Be Dangerous.

Farting Can Be Dangerous. . My Grannie’s getting windier Each time I go to visit. She loudly farts ten times an hour That’s not a nice thing is it. . I called again and found her there All sprawled upon her back. They said she was the victim of A sudden fart attack. . . […]

Adult Poem: Brevity Is No Sin.

Brevity Is No Sin. . The fame of Reverend Christopher Takes little explanation. He kept his sermons very short Which pleased his congregation. . .

Poem: The Doggelganger.

The Doggelganger. (A man’s best friend is his doggelganger) . People always say you’ll find That owners and their pets, Grow more alike with passing years You see it at the vets. . My butcher has a Boxer dog, They share a fierce mien, My uncle and his Corgi are A pair of portly men. […]

Poem: Hippopotamus.

Hippopotamus. . The name sounds absurd But the old bull is not. Don’t think to approach him His temper is hot. He’s dangerous, he’s deadly, decidedly mean, A one to avoid on the African scene. If you see calves with cows I don’t think you should moo, These cantankerous mothers Will cut you in two. […]

Poem: Sharks One, Lisa None.

Sharks One, Lisa None. . Lisa Doogood was awfully rude To people who tried to be nice, When they told her “Don’t swim” …………………………..”There’s a shark” ,…………………………..”Don’t go in” She refused to consider it twice. She said, “Fish cannot stop me, I’m not the least feared”. So when Jaws came and ate her The people […]

Poem: But It Will Not Hold Up Your Knickers.

But It Will Not Hold Up Your Knickers. . Time is elastic You find it will stretch Depending on quite what The future will fetch . A party you long for Takes time to appear But a dental appointment Is instantly here . .