Displaying posts categorized under

Fun Poems

Poem:When Does A Duck Have Scales? (extract from Bone Soup)

. when does a duck have scales? . i saw an indian restaurant and ordered me a dish i said i wanted bombay duck but what i got was fish . historical information* *bummalo was the indian name for quite a horrid fish because it sounded naughty not a soul would eat the dish and […]

Poem: Never Tell A Tale To A Tell Tale Tit.(adult version)

. never tell a tale to a tell tale tit . have you got a secret tell me tell me true whisper all about the things you were not supposed to do tell me all your naughty plans and all your naughty deeds tell me of your secret dreams and all your rotten needs i […]

Poem: Man Cannot Live By Bread Alone. (Extract from Bone Soup.)

man cannot live by bread alone. (he needs carrots) . don’t sneer at a carrot they’re good and they’re fun i’ve met quite a few and i’ve liked every one . they have many functions and take many roles they’re really quite useful for stopping up holes . should you happen to chance upon good […]

Poem: Bad Manners.

. bad manners . lord give me patience lord give me grace i’ll snap if one more bloody bastard sneezes in my face . . .j

Poem: No Government Safety Warning.

. . no government safety warning . There are no safety labels on my birthday suit am i proofed against fire is it safe to ablute will it tear from a tug get a run from a click will it melt in the sun be dissolved by my sick will it stretch if i bend […]

Poem: Sunbathing

sunbathing . i sunbathed nude in manchester got browner there than most . i sunbathed in mombasa till i looked like crispy toast . i sunbathed on a cape town beach there were others there much darker . i sunbathed up in sunderland but i had to wear a parka . j .