Would you give him one? The Great Game.

Hi again,

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I have just realised that there is no sound of traffic outside, so that must mean that I have got the day wrong again and it must be Sunday.

I will go and check.

Yes, all the shops are shut and I found Friday’s paper.

My husband buys The Times every day except Saturday, because he says it is too expensive on a Saturday, and The Sunday Times just repeats of all the same stuff anyway.

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He has made a ritual of doing the Sudoku for hours every day as he believes it keeps his brain sharp.

It probably does but it does not help his social life and it is boring for me,

I often ask him something, only to  find my questions directed to two glassy eyes, behind which is a brain grappling with maths computations, and he fires terse replies to questions which he will later on deny ever having been asked.

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Should he ever be found, choked to death on a future issue of The Times, then  I fully intend to present this post as proof that I am not guilty on the grounds of previous mental cruelty.

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Actually, I am thoroughly enjoying this blogging business now.

It is better than talking to  Old Glass Eyes.

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I was beginning to suspect that he had found some clever way of nodding off,with his eyes wide open, whenever I decided to sit down and have a chat with him to keep our relationship fresh.

It became very obvious that he does do something very devious, because he later seems to have no knowledge of any of the things I thought we had been discussing.

Days later, when I refer back to something I thought we had discussed in depth, I find that his memory is completely blank, and if I tell him he should remember all about it, he gets ratty and won’t talk to me anymore because I am getting hysterical, and shouting at him.

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You cannot win really, and life is too short to have arguments.

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It is nice to post stuff up on my blog, as someone out there might be interested enough to read my ramblings.

At least the odds are better than they are at home, where I can be sure that nobody is.

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Of course I  exaggerate, horribly, but who cares. It is a bit like talking to my friends at home.

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Talking about my friends.

I invented a good game that we play when we go out for a meal together. It is called ‘Would you give him one?’

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This came about after I sat listening to a group of girls sitting behind me, when I was on a bus, on the way over to visit my mother.

They had obviously been out together the night before, in a part of the town where there are lots of pubs and nightclubs in close proximity.

They were talking about the guys they had met on their pub crawl, and which ones they had found attractive enough.

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One girl was teased because she had been with a guy and then disappeared for a while.

All the others started shrieking “Did you give him one then, did you give him one.” Closely followed by “Go on, you did didn’t you.  Tell the truth.” She eventually started laughing and squealed “So what if I did.  It’s none of your business is it””

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This barrage continued as we passed from bus stop to bus stop.

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By the time they eventually disembarked, gold handbags, chipped nail varnish and chewing gum, the interrogations had resulted in the girl having confessed to giving one to three different men on that same memorable night.

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AND SO THE GREAT GAME WAS BORN.

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We have great fun discussing some guy or other, often a film star such as Brad Pitt, and asking, “Yes, but would you give him one ?”

The results can be very surprising sometimes.

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While I am on that subject.  Have you seen Brad Pitt in Kalifornia.

Made many years ago and starring Juliette Lewis and Kathy Larson. He was really scary in that.
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And no, I would not give Brad Pit one because I do not like his nostrils

That is probably a lie.

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